Reverse Psychoanalysis
by theultimateawesome
Summary: The study group is in therapy. Britta tries to help the group while in therapy, much to the dismay of the actual psychologist. After everyone's psyche is explored, the psychologist turns the tables on Britta, and secrets come out that shock the group.
1. Chapter 1

****A/N this is only my 2nd fic. There will be Troy/Britta, but that's Chapter 5. I am working on the ending****

**Chapter 1: Intro and the study of Shirley and Annie**

The study group filed into the tiny dark room where a man with small glasses and a pointed beard sat with a clipboard. Britta eagerly rushed and sat beside him in another seat that was facing 7 other empty seats. She was smiling despite the fact that Starburns, one of Greendale's beloved misfits, had recently passed away.

The group was there for therapy to get over the death, as recommended by the Dean. It's not that Starburns wasn't an important person; it's just they didn't think they needed therapy for this. Britta introduced herself to the psychologist in a way that almost seemed "Annie-like" at first, but quickly turned into a Britta moment at the end, "Hi, I'm Britta Perry, rising psychologist. I am so ready to start therapizing, and really start digging deep to get into the giant well of emotions." The rest of the group groaned, and the psychologist awkwardly shook her hand and spoke, "Well, I'm Dr. Xavier, and I am a licensed psychologist. Today, we're going to talk about your beloved friend Alex." Troy and Abed's face lit up at his name because they were thinking about X-Men, then they did their patented handshake. Jeff remarked, "I don't know if he was exactly beloved or a friend, and we know him as Starburns. Actually, I don't even understand why we're here." "The Dean has requested that each of you work together in group therapy to get over this death, and I am just following his request," Dr. Xavier answered. "Well, since it's just a request, then it's optional, right? We don't HAVE to be here," Jeff asked. "Unfortunately, you're wrong, you have to go through therapy in order to be accepted back into your classes." Pierce spoke up, "Ha! We don't even want to go to class, right Jeff? So, we'll see you later." Annie fought back, "Um, Pierce we have to go to class to graduate, so in other words we HAVE to be here." Everyone groaned and settled back into their seats. "Besides guys, this is my chance to really practice my skills, and you're all going to help," Britta said. Everyone groaned again, but a little louder this time. Britta had a confused, but hurt look on her face. "Britta, if he's Dr. Xavier does that make you Storm?" Troy asked with the enthusiasm of an 8 year old. "Yeah, my psychology skills are like lightning bolts striking your brains for emotional experiences," Britta said as she awkwardly tried to fit in. Troy's face turned sour as Abed rolled his eyes.

"Okay can we just get started?" Dr. Xavier asked, "Let's start with your names." Each person said their name, then Dr. Xavier continued. "Let's start with, Shirley, you've been quiet this whole time; what did Alex...Starburns mean to you?" "Aside from him sexually harassing me and him being the butt of our jokes, nothing." "Nothing?" Dr. Xavier asked, "but you said he was the butt of your jokes." "Um, I said OUR jokes. Everyone joked on Starburns," Shirley said as she defended herself. "But the focus here is on you," Dr. Xavier explained, "have you ever been a bully before?" "Oh, he's good," Jeff remarked. "Oh shut up Jeffery," Shirley yelled, then immediately covered her mouth, "Oh my goodness I'm so sorry. Yes, I was a brutal bully in the past, and I guess I still am sometimes." "Hmm," Dr. Xavier said as he wrote on his clipboard, "seems to me like you try to pretend to be overly good to hide your past, so you can avoid being called a hypocrite when you judge others for being bad people." Shirley's mouth dropped open, and she was speechless.

"Now let's talk about...Annie," Dr. Xavier said. "Ooh let me try this one," Britta butted in. Dr. Xavier rolled his eyes, but let Britta try. "Okay, so you were a nerd in school right? So, you took a bunch of pills like Jessie Spano on Saved by the Bell, right?" Abed gave a thumbs up to the reference, but Annie got irritated. "Um, who is Jessie, and I don't really feel comfortable with you psychoanalyzing me, Britta. You're not very good at it." Britta looked at Dr. Xavier for confirmation, and he nodded his head in agreement with Annie. "Britta, you can't just tell someone things that are wrong or used to be wrong with them. You have to get them to realize it for themselves or else they'll be defensive." He continued with Annie, "okay, so what did Alex mean to you?" Annie continued, "he was a druggy and he never paid attention in any of his classes. He just constantly wanted people to notice him with his stupid gimmicks." Dr. Xavier spoke next, "So, you have a problem with people that work hard to try to be noticed?" Annie looked around, "Well, not...exactly," then she became defensive, "Look, I have worked hard in my classes, and I deserve more recognition than I get for that. He just wore dumb hats, and here we are all talking about him like he was important." Everyone gasped and looked at Annie for her obvious, but rare, hypocrisy. Jeff especially looked at her like she was crazy. Annie's eyes watered when she realized what she sounded like. "I didn't mean...I just...I just want people to like me and recognize me for the good things I've done," Annie confessed. Dr. Xavier said, "You are a good person, Annie. You just need to realize that everyone does like you for the good that you've done." She smiled at her friends, "I'm sorry you guys." Troy patted her on the shoulder and told her it was okay, and the rest of the group agreed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: The Study of Pierce and Jeff**

"Okay, let's move on," Dr. Xavier continued, "Pierce Hawthorne...from Hawthorne Wipes?" Pierce lit up, and got up to shake his hand, "Yes, that's right. Nice to meet you." "Nice to meet you too," Dr. Xavier shook his hand, "but you weren't the President of the company right?" Pierce looked down, "No, that was my dad. He's dead now." "So, tell me what you remember about Starburns," the psychologist said. "He was a very humorous man. He sold me some pills one time. I found him very charming." "You would," quipped Jeff. Pierce continued, "I feel pretty much the same about you, you know, minus the part about the pills. You two could have been my sons." Dr. Xavier looked and wrote on his clipboard as this all unfolded. Jeff spoke next, "Your son? Yeah, if I wanted to be an insecure old guy with daddy issues with a failed career, then yeah I guess I could be your son." Everyone gasped again. "What?" Jeff thought about what he said with a frightening realization, "oh my God, I could be your son." Pierce said, "Told you. I don't actually want you to be like me, Jeffery. I don't actually want to be myself sometimes." Pierce started crying, and Annie said "Awww," as she went to hug Pierce.

Dr. Xavier spoke next, "I think that Jeff and Pierce have had a breakthrough here." Britta butted in again, "Yes, it's very obvious that this is the edible complex." Dr. Xavier rolled his eyes at her, and said "Oedipal." "That's what I said," Britta defended. Dr. Xavier ignored her and focused on Jeff this time. "Jeff, what did you think about Starburns?" Jeff said, "What can you say? He was a guy with stars as his sideburns. I think that sums it up enough." Annie defended the dead classmate, "And you're a guy in a shirt that's way too expensive for anyone here to know what brand it is. Does that sum it up enough?" "Actually, Annie, it does. It sums up the fact that I care about everyone enough to look better than everyone everyday," Jeff argued. Britta chimed in, "Textbook narcissism. Is your therapist helping you with your shirts, too?" "Britta, everyone wants you to stop pretending you're qualified to psychoanalyze us. You have enough issues of your own," Jeff said. Dr. Xavier looked at Britta who quickly looked away, then he spoke, "Jeff, it doesn't seem like you're any better than anyone else about projecting your feelings onto others. Your main problem with Starburns was his appearance, and that's why you're so defensive of yours. You're afraid of what people think of you." Jeff, for the first time didn't defend himself, and just sat quietly.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: The Study of Troy and Abed**

For most of the analysis of the study group, Troy and Abed had been talking about X-Men. Then their names were called out, "Troy and Abed, let's talk about what you felt about Starburns. Troy, let's start with you." "Um, well I didn't know him like that. He had a cool pet lizard I guess, but the lizard kept humping my pencil in class. It was weird" Troy said. "Riiiight," said the psychologist. Troy continued, "I don't know. Starburns always seemed like he wanted to get caught goofing off in class. I think he constantly joked around because he was comfortable with that more than school." "And what are you comfortable with, Troy?" the psychologist asked. "Oh, my best friend, Abed." he and Abed gave each other a high five right on cue, "we play games, we watch movies, we pretend in the dreamatorium. It's awesome." "And what are your plans after college, Troy?" Dr. Xavier asked. "I don't know. I guess I'd still be having fun with Abed?" Troy asked uncertainly. "What about money and a career?," continued Dr. Xavier. Troy said, "I try not to think about those things. I don't really think it's in me to have a regular job. I don't really know," he said mystified then paused, "whoa Dr. Xavier get out of my brain!"

"Hi, Abed," Dr. Xavier turned his attention to the quiet, lanky male. "Hello... Pew" Abed said as he shot a fake laser at Dr. Xavier. Dr. Xavier laughed it off and then said, "tell me about your feelings about Starburns death." Abed answered, "I don't really do well with those. He was here and now he's not. Doesn't seem like most people miss him, though." Dr. Xavier then said, "I want to know if YOU miss him, Abed. I'm not worried about everyone else." "Hmm. You mean miss him like on Weekend at Bernie's? Are you saying we should drag his dead body to beach parties?" Abed asked. "Yes!" exclaimed Troy. "Abed, I think you should stop living your life through the eyes of others. Whether that's your friends or characters on movies. I think you should start seeing life through your eyes." Britta chimed in once more, "told you Abed. You can totally live life the way you want to. You don't have to bend to anyone's expectations." "Well, I kind of do," Abed said, "you all expect me to be myself, but myself is in all of you, so that's why I try to see the world through your eyes. It helps me understand myself." Annie and Shirley let out another "awww." Britta spoke again, "Well, I guess that's everyone. So, should we go get lunch?"


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: The Study of Britta**

Dr. Xavier stopped her, "No, Britta, there's one more person we haven't analyzed." Britta's face turned more pale than usual as she realized he meant her. "Why don't you go sit with your friends." She took a seat on the other side of Troy and looked quite nervous. "Britta, tell me about your childhood," Dr. Xavier said. "Umm aren't you supposed to ask me about Starburns? I thought that's how this thing worked," Britta asked. "Well, it's different for everyone. Go on." Dr. Xavier explained. "Well, what's to tell, really? My mom was a housewife that catered to everything my alcoholic, controlling dad wanted," she explained in a rush.

She really didn't want the group to know about this. "Are you going to have a family someday?" he asked Britta. "No, at least not out of my free will," she said. "Why not?" Dr. Xavier asked. "I don't know. I don't want to be controlled by some dude. I want to live a life for myself," she said. "Why can't you have both?" he asked. "My mom thought she could have both. She wanted to be a baker, and when she met my dad, she gave up all of her dreams just to cater to him instead," the blonde explained. "But, you realize you don't have to follow in her footsteps, right?" Dr. Xavier said. "I don't have to, but I do it all the time. I'm attracted to guys who are emotionally unavailable. I try to convince myself that I do that because they are mostly no strings attached, but that was exactly the type of guy my dad was," she said. "So, if you know the problem, then why don't you fix it?" Dr. Xavier asked. "I'm afraid I can't. I tried fixing the relationship between my parents, and all that got me was more arguments between them. I tried to help at my dad's store, and I ended up ruining everything. Sometimes I even think that dinosaur was my fault," she said.

Everyone looked confused. "What dinosaur?" Dr. Xavier asked. "Jurassic Park was my favorite movie, and I begged my dad to get me a dinosaur for my birthday. He ended up paying some guy in a back alley to put on a dinosaur costume for my party, and...and the rest doesn't matter" she cut herself off. "Oh I think it does. Britta, please continue," Dr. Xavier said. She was now visibly shaken. Troy put his arm around her to console her. "That day, the dinosaur commented on how I looked much older than my age, and he said that he had a special gift for me in the back of the shop. My dad already left, so I couldn't ask him if it was okay. I just went. Then, when we were back there, he wasn't a dinosaur anymore," she said almost as if she was a child again, "he was just some scuzzy guy, and he...he started putting his hands on me," Britta became breathless. She couldn't speak anymore, and the psychologist and everyone else could figure out the rest of the story. She got up to leave.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: The Study of Fixing Broken Things (this is the T/B chapter :) )**

Everyone's faces were frozen in a horrified state. Troy especially became horrified. He realized how much more powerful his lie from before was than he thought. He had lied and said he was molested in a theater class, and Britta took to him because she could relate; because she had been too. He hurt her way worse than he thought, and he felt like the worst person on earth. He apologized back then, but something in him made him go to her again.

Everyone watched as Troy got up to leave the room. He found her at the fountain outside. She had her feet in the water and just looked like she was in a daze. He approached her with caution. "Britta?" She didn't look at him, but she said, "Hey Troy," in a voice more meek and calm than her normal authoritative tone. "Britta, I know I said it once already, but I had no idea you...I'm sorry," he said. "Troy, it's okay; you didn't know. I just wish you guys knew me before that. I was a fun kid, you know. I wasn't always annoying people and being lame," she said. "I know. I mean Jurassic Park was your favorite movie. How awesome is that? I love that movie," he said excitedly. She finally looked at him and smiled. "You know, I don't think you'd Britta a serious relationship if it was a guy that was healthy for you," he said. She smiled again.

Troy tried to be discreet about how he felt for Britta, but sometimes it was really obvious. She really did like him, but she was afraid of screwing up his life. "And you don't have to be scared of having a career," she said, "you have way too many talents to not have any goals." "Looks like we both have fears of screwing things up adult things," Troy said. "Yeah," Britta laughed. "Let's make a deal right now," Troy said as if a lightbulb appeared over his head, "let's both work on trying." Britta looked confused. "You should try to be in a healthy relationship instead of intentionally Britta-ing one with every lame dude you come across, and I'll try to set my goals and pick a future career." "You mean instead of Troy-ing with your career choices?" Britta asked. "And I'll try to make you better at jokes," Troy said. Britta laughed it off, and said "Okay, but we have to help each other." "Okay, I can see how you'd help me with mine, but how exactly am I supposed to help you with yours? I don't know if I want to set you up on dates," Troy said nervously. Britta started doing her best impression of Dr. Xavier, "And why is that, Troy?" Troy just smiled sheepishly and looked down and then back up at Britta as he tried to explain, "I don't know...I...well...okay so...," he exhaled deeply, and grabbed Britta by the waist. He looked into her eyes right before they shared the most passionate kiss either of them ever had. When they broke apart, it was like they needed more air to pump their fast beating hearts. "I love you, Britta," Troy said as he regained his breath. Britta looked at him still in a bit of a daze and said, "I love you too." "Looks like you're already way ahead on your end of the deal," he said. "Well you're a good helper," she said with a smile. "Think I should help some more?" he asked. Britta just nodded as she kissed him again.


	6. Chapter 6

As the study group came back to their regular table, there was a happy feeling in the air. While Britta and Troy were making their deal, Annie and Jeff had made a deal with each other to not worry so much about how people perceive them and just do what makes them happy. Jeff also made a deal with Pierce to spend more time with him and respect him more. Shirley made a deal with Abed that she would try to not bully or judge anyone so harshly, and Abed made a deal to start to try being himself without relying on others so much.

Jeff said, "something feels different; it feels...good. Are we still at Greendale?" Annie smiled at him and then said, "well, should we start studying?" Everyone opened their books reluctantly as the Dean dressed in a rainbow unitard came in at the last minute, "Hi, hi, hi, everyone! Today is Free Highlighter Friday in the student bookstore, so make sure you get one of every color!" "And, we're back," Jeff said in his usual deadpan voice. The rest of the group just smiled at each other.


End file.
